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Ama

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[06 Jul 2005|08:16pm]
Okay, it has also been brought to my attention that a lot of people went to foxfur's journal and completely ripped into her for the evidence she posted discrediting my story.

To be honest, I expected everyone to go read that post and to believe her. All of her evidence is well-thought-out, well-researched, and makes perfect sense. Furthermore, it took a great deal of courage for her to report the wrong of something she considered a close friend had done. I didn't expect for anyone not to believe her, and certainly didn't expect anyone to rip into her, flame her, and make her life Hell about it.

It's pointless to say that I didn't tell or encourage anyone to do so, because this entire problem was caused by my thoughtlessness- I might as well have. I also don't think it means much when I say I'm sorry, but I'm saying it anyway- M, I'm sorry. There is no justification.
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[06 Jul 2005|07:43pm]
I believe this has gone quite far enough, so I shall now explain myself.

My cat was not set on fire. That is the important thing to know here- though such things have happened in this neighborhood, neither he nor I was so unfortunate. I'm sorry to all of you who were hurt by this, who cried, who were deeply worried, who were angered, who gave up things big and small to support me. I never intended any harm, and that is about the best I can say for myself- it does not excuse my behavior.

From here, you have the option of being extremely angry with me without listening to my reasoning. If you'd care to hear it, please read on.

Read more...Collapse )

Beyond everything else, it has been proven that at least in this sector of the world, humans are very good people.

To those of you who believed me, I'm sorry for not telling you the truth immediately. I was afraid you would be rightfully indignant and blow my cover. To those of you who didn't believe me, I'm sorry for defending myself so vigorously.

I'm not going to leave it at this- there will be the said donation to the SPCA, and also letters to the Dallas Morning News, Star-Telegram, and any other wide-circulation newspapers anyone suggests.

I want to clear up a few misconceptions:
-"At least I'm not on fire" was not intended as humor. It's a catchphrase for me throughout life, really- no matter how bad it is, even if you're dying of it, you're at least lucky not to be on fire.
-None of the money donated will be spent. I had at one point considered giving it directly to the SPCA, but vetoed that as that would still be fraud.
-I do not expect forgiveness or even any kind of acceptance. Just please, no mail bombs.

It's important for everyone to realize that manhattan and hangedwoman supported me out of good faith- I ordinarily am a very private person who only rarely pulls stunts, and never anything on this scale before. So please do not lower your opinion of them, or anyone else who defended me- it was my deceptiveness that colored the entire situation.
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[06 Jul 2005|04:32am]
[ mood | indescribable ]

foxfur has made a post detailing how this entire situation has been a scam and how this can be proven. Other people, in the comments, have added their remarks on the suspicious nature of it all.

As foxfur says, please do not believe either of us right away, but instead do whatever research you see fit.

As of right now, I am unwilling to provide proof of the truthfulness of my story. In my mind, this is because I'm hurt and angry and don't feel obliged to anyone to do so, but if you personally believe that it's because I'm lying, that is a burden I'm willing to accept.

If you need my contact information, you can get that from foxfur as well.

I am still working on refunding donations, including fees. I'm sorry if you're feelings are hurt by this, but it all has a bad taste in my mouth now, and I'm really angry at myself for forgetting the $12,000 of art sitting in my closet when this first began. I'm a pretty private person, and probably would have only told my Friends List, and certainly never gotten into all this.

If you have anything to say to me, please use city_glitter@livejournal.com and not the e-mail address associated with my PayPal account.

As said in the last post, leftover proceeds from the art sale will be given to the SPCA in the name of "all the people from the Internet who reached out with generosity and compassion when Schro was senselessly abused", or possibly something more succinct as needed. Thank you all, again.

And now it is time to go see my cat.

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[05 Jul 2005|08:07pm]
Due to some dramatics by a well-meaning friend, the veracity of my story has been called into question. Due to some confusion, this friend has found evidence that supports her suspicion. Due to my not feeling the need to defend myself against the irrational anger of others, I am choosing not to provide her with the proof she seeks. I'll spare all of you the details (unless you want to know, of course), but I'll leave judgement up to you individually.

Tomorrow, I'll be looking for an art dealer to sell my Kinkades to. Whatever money doesn't go to the vet bills will go to the SPCA- I'm expecting that to be quite a bit, actually. It will be in all of your names, at least in some general way.

As of right now, I am returning donations. I know many of you said to keep them, but I really don't feel like it's fair for me to accept money from you when I have $12,000 or more sitting in my closet. I still appreciate your generosity, but now you can do more with it than I can.

I will continue to post updates on Schro's condition as things progress.

If anyone feels they've been wronged, I'm sorry.

EDIT: The Hell? I was messing in options and somehow managed to disable comments...sorry! Fixed now!
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[05 Jul 2005|06:00pm]
[ mood | tired ]

Well, Schro is doing rather well considering what he went through. He was awake for a little while when I was there, albeit still very drugged.

potentially disturbingCollapse )

They let me open the cage, as he most likely wasn't going anywhere, and I scritched him about the chin and ears. He purred, and fell asleep with his head burrowed into hand. Usually, I would tease him because he would drool slightly in his sleep and my hand would wind up smelling like cat food, but this time it was the best thing to ever happen to me.

I can't believe how brave he is. I spaz totally if I burn myself even slightly. I want to be more like Schro.

The police came shortly after I got back from the clinic. Lo and behold, we have a known offender against cats in the neighborhood. They didn't tell me his name and I didn't ask, but they went looking for him to ask some questions after hearing all the details. This is a low-crime, relatively wealthy neighborhood, so I trust things will move quickly from here.

And now, the part that's going to make you all hate me:

Upon going upstairs shortly ago, I abruptly realized I have a bunch of art lying around. Specifically, three Thomas Kinkade lithographs. They're worth about $4,000 apiece. Upon realizing that I have $12,000 just lying around the house, I was immediately consumed by glee at realizing I can give you all your money back and no one is any the worse for wear. However, as much as I want to do this, I'm afraid feelings will be hurt. I just don't think it's fair to take money from people when I actually have my own, but had forgotten. So, please tell me your thoughts.

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[05 Jul 2005|04:46am]
[ mood | content ]

Now that I've learned to drive on the fly...drive...I will be going up early in the morning (around this time) to stay with Schro, since this is the time his biological clock makes him the most active. I'm bringing him my nice fleecy burgundy hoodie this time, in case my velvet cardigan has lost my scent, and will sit with him in case he wakens. My cell phone will be off- I know a few of you will text message me or call me, and I love you, but I don't think a vaguely squeaky rendition of the Charlie's Angels theme is what he'll want to be woken up by. But I do adore you all. &hearts

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[04 Jul 2005|11:12pm]
[ mood | happy ]

If you sent your payment any time in the last hour and a half (after the finances were taken care of) and would like a refund, please let me know. Otherwise, the extra money will be used as a reward in finding the person responsible, as suggested by calantha.

Love,
Me

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[04 Jul 2005|09:45pm]
[ mood | ecstatic ]

My father came home just now, in a bit of a mood. He's a moody dork, so it's not surprising. The point being that I recognized his vulnerability and showed him the incredibly generous donations and hundreds of compassionate comments left by all of you wonderful people. I am so shamelessly manipulative. He started to cry, carrying on about how Schro is the perfect cat and he loves Schro so much and Schro is so selfless. All of which is true. More importantly, he then said that he would pay the rest of the bill- not nearly so large an amount now.

So. We're all off the hook now, especially Schro. And there's no way it would have been possible without all of you. Thank you, thank you, thank you, THANK YOU. You are love.

To those of you who were in the process of getting together donations, please use that funding for the benefit of your own loved ones, be they furred or not, for your personal pleasure, or for your charitable cause of choice. My cup runneth over.

I will try to get pictures as soon as possible...I'm reluctant to take pictures of how he looked when last I saw him, because it was sickening and heartbreaking at once. But I'll do my best.

God, Goddess, whatever you do or don't believe in, bless you all. Don't speak of being ashamed of being human- you are what makes being human wonderful. And I will never forget it.

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[04 Jul 2005|06:54pm]
[ mood | tired ]

A real update. I'm sorry I haven't posted sooner, but I'm a freak about replying to almost every comment.

Schro was out of surgery a bit back and sleeping in a peaceful drugged haze with my sweater. I haven't been able to get out of the house to go see him, unfortunately, but will do so as soon as I can. I'm going to be very angry if he wakes up there afraid and hurting, but the vet assured me that they'd keep him well-dosed with painkillers at least.

Details I forgot to mention earlier: The burns were second and some third-degree, over about 45% of his body. He's had blood transfusions, skin grafts (I had no idea they had feline skin graft technology, but I'm glad for it!), plus antibiotics and painkillers. His mucuous membranes are unharmed, and his darling tail survived whole, as did his ears despite being somewhat singed. He went into shock, but seemed to be okay when they put him under for surgery.

I have contacted the police, the local SPCA, and two news stations. I have also written letters-to-the-editor to the Dallas Morning News and my town's paper. Neither news station sounded interested, but that's because I haven't gotten hold of the right person yet. Tomorrow or as soon as I'm not homebound listening for the phone, I will begin canvassing the neighborhood to do my own investigative work- most of the people in my townhome complex are elderly people who likely can't move fast enough to catch a cat, so I don't think the suspect list will be long. I will be seeking criminal charges and damages.

Many, many thanks to all of you who have sent donations and/or left kind words and promises of prayers. Your kindness will come back to you manifold, and I hope I can be one of the ones to return it sometime in the future.

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[04 Jul 2005|02:15pm]
[ mood | indescribable ]

So, yeah. Woke up from a fitful couch sleep only discover my various presences on the Internets flooded with unprecedented kindness.

Since I didn't do anything heroic and thus can't really say I bleed kittons, I will say that all of you are proof that anyone's faith in humanity is in fact extremely well-founded. Buddhist doctrine states that one person dedicated to love and acceptance makes up for 750,000 who aren't. And you people aren't just dedicated to love- you ARE love. You make up for it. I love you, Schro loves you (he isn't capable of not loving anyone), and the universe loves you.

More relevantly, Schro got out of his second surgery a while back. He's going to be fine, if rather scarred, at least physically. Emotionally, I don't know. I'm calling the clinic back periodically, and waiting for my father to leave so I can take the bus back down there. Or for him to find a better outlet for his guilt than insensitivity.

Thank all of you for your compassion. There is no hate in existence that can bury it.

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[04 Jul 2005|09:51am]
[ mood | blank ]

After another screaming fight with my father, I grabbed the car keys and drove back to the vet clinic. Talk about learning the accelerator on the fly. I didn't get anyone killed or dent the car, however.

I took along my black velvet sweater for Schro. The nurse (?) said she'd put it in his cage. They let me see him, though he was conked out...I hope the person who did this feels my heartsickness and Schro's pain as intolerable guilt. That's as kind as I can be.

For lack of a better idea, I'm going to try to sell my extra Greyhound ticket. That'll be only a fraction of the bill, but it's my best idea so far. So, if you or anyone else needs a round-trip Greyhound ticket from anywhere in the U.S. to anywhere else in the U.S., please contact me. I'm willing to let it go for as little as $90, far less than the usual cost.

And at manhattan's suggestion, donations through PayPal will be gratefully accepted. Don't give if it's going to make your life difficult, please. The address for donations is:

mriddleops@comcast.net

I passed out after coming home, and I think I'm going to go sleep some more. I would have just stayed at the clinic, but my father called me and demanded I bring back the car, which is fair I suppose. I'll get an hour and then take the bus back.

EDIT: Original story is here. Schro, for the record, is one of the two cats who own me, the cat of my dreams, the black velvet bit of limitless undying cosmic love who gives my life happiness and beauty. Who has answered the eternal question of quantum physics posed by the paradox of Schröedinger's Cat in coming out alive. Take that. &hearts




EDIT 2: The financial situation has been taken care of, thanks to the incredible generosity of so many. Any further donations will either be refunded at the donor's request, or used as reward money in the capture of the perpetrator. &hearts
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[04 Jul 2005|04:06am]
I'm...wow. I have no idea what to do with myself.

Apparently, as we left for the movie tonight, we held the door open too long and Schro got out. We didn't notice, being as we suck at pet parenting.

After the movie, we're sitting in Denny's talking to some friends of his. My cell goes off. I can't hear crap, so I tell them I'll call them back in a minute and go outside.

Apparently, someone got hold of him and set him on fire. His rear end, though he got badly burnt all the way up to his shoulders, and his ears are singed.

So, we rushed home. My dad spent the whole mile and a half talking about how it's already too late and it's too bad and at least we still have Taki. Which resulted in me screaming at him. We got here, met the person who heard the screaming and someone laughing and saw the flames (whoever it was apparently extinguished him after a minute or so) and had the guts to touch him to read his collar tag. The lady whose husband maintains the pool, actually. She had him in a towel and took him to the only vet clinic we called that was open today.

I don't actually know what they did, but he's apparently going to be okay. He's burnt bad, but everything's whole, and they're keeping him sedated. I don't know where I'm going to get the $5,000, since my dad has informed me he's not paying it, but I don't give a shit really. I must have something I can sell.

Yeah. I don't have any words. It's just as well for whoever did this, really, and for my sense of self, as I try not to be a vengeful person. I always tell my father that we won't let him out around Halloween because people are fucktards...what is it that made me think people would wait for Halloween? I guess any old holiday will do.

Yeah, going to go flip a shit now.

EDIT: This has got to be some kind of fucked-up nightmare. Please wake up. Schro never scratches or bites, not even when you grab him in an awkward way. He just lays back in your arms and tilts his chin up for scritches. And purrs. Why? What's the point of hurting something weaker than you are, of hating a creature of pure love?

EDIT 2: Because I'm only just now gathering enough I.Q. points to think to edit this post...the financial situation is taken care of now. I thank all of you for your incredible generosity and loving-kindness, and am happy to report that much is no longer a worry. Please, just send prayers and positive energy now. All is well. Any donations from this point forward will either be refunded as per the benefactor's request, or used as reward money in finding the perpetrator. THANK YOU!
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filched from buhfly [29 Jun 2005|08:58pm]
[ mood | still twitchy ]

anysolider.com

Pre-made care packages and guidelines for assembling your own to send to U.S. soldiers who don't get any mail.

Let me just say that I don't support the war in Iraq (or anywhere else), nor do I support the institution of the U.S. military as long as it's being used inappropriately. In fact, I fairly literally saw red at the "Freedom is not free" part and had to be calmed down with a bit of reasonable discourse by buhfly. But the fact is that they're people who either don't want to be there or believe they're doing what's best for us (or both), so they deserve a little love, or really anything better than what they're getting from the Bush administration. So, give 'em the love.

Oh, by the way- freedom really isn't free. So give to your favorite progressive party also, please.

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[27 Jun 2005|02:06am]
[ mood | tired ]

So, vampire pr0n finished. Don't know what to call it, really, but here it is.

Kindly beta-d by foxfur. It is also dedicated to her, for believing in my writing even though I often do not. &hearts

Read more...Collapse )

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[25 Jun 2005|11:27pm]
[ mood | weird ]

I've been trying to write vampire porn, just to do something I haven't done. However, I think vampires are silly and am having a hard time taking it seriously. foxfur asked me to write thigh-biting, which I was happy to do, but towards the end the stupid got hold of me. I'm posting this because buhfly says I have to.

Alessandro=vampire seme, blah
Drake=non-vampire uke

M/M, not explicitCollapse )

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[25 Jun 2005|12:04am]
Want a custom layout?

Seriously, folks. This woman is teh win. And her prices are very good for the work she does. She also does fabulous Web design and other graphics. In fact, if you happen to be in Miami and want a Web designer/graphic artist, she is droids you're looking for.
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[24 Jun 2005|07:46pm]
I really should learn to just leave this sort of thing alone.

Gmail keeps provoking me with its choice of text ads, such as standupgirl.com, an extremely poorly-disguised (with trendy, feminine imagery, of course) bit of religious right anti-abortion propaganda. So, I naturally just HAD to send an e-mail.

re: abortionCollapse )
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brought to my attention by fallofrain [15 Jun 2005|06:21pm]
Congress is majorly slashing funding for PBS and NPR.

For those of you who go "and?", let me just remind you of the state of this nation, and let me ask if you really think the general condition of poor education needs to get any worse.

Full story here.

Sign the petition to stop it.

Me, personally...well, let's just say I love science documentaries and we haven't always had the Discovery Channel, which is mostly about motorcycles anyway.
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[10 Jun 2005|04:52pm]
[ mood | happy ]

Last night, daysgoby rescused a kitten that someone had thrown from the window of a speeding car. The kitten is going to make it, but needs a home in the Jacksonville, FL area. daysgoby will also be setting up a PayPal account to help cover the kitten's incidental expenses- even a little bit will help.

Please note that as of my last readings of the associated threads, the kitten DOES still need a home- adifferentdrum's SIL wanted to adopt Oliver but could not.

The Original Story.
Update.
Latest Update.
Pictures!

PayPal donations should go to: vanitynofair@comcast.net

NOTE: I don't particularly want to hear about how you'd like to throw the person who did this out of a car window at 55 mph. Biblical rage does neither the kitten, nor the rest of the world, any good.

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[10 Jun 2005|03:57am]
Have you ever thought about who you are?

I don't mean what you've done in your life, the way you wear your hair, what you say when someone on the street asks you for money. Those things are parts of your whole, too, but only in a rather superficial way.

You are made up of atoms. Atoms are made up of subatomic particles held together by an enormous strong force of the universe, a force so strong that almost impossible amounts of speed and power are required to break them apart. In turn, individual atoms are held together by that same strong force to form elements, compounds, tissues, organs, you. Even the energy required to make your neurons fire, to give you the thought process required to read this, is considerable.

99% of the universe is empty space. Matter and energy are precious and rare, even more so in cohesive forms like galaxies, planets, and people.

No matter what you think of yourself, your words, your actions, your life, whether or not you believe in destiny or in God or in the essential good of human beings, remember this: fundamental existence wanted you here so much that, against all odds, despite all the work required, all those atoms and compounds and tissues and organs and neuroelectricity came together to be you. You, the person you are and the person you choose to be.

That is how passionately you are loved.
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